I’m feeling better than I have felt in a long time. And it’s euphoric. I’m by no means “cured,” and I also still do not have the functioning I had before I got sick, but on the whole I’m feeling better. Maybe even good enough to dance again…?
Yesterday, and I’m not sure how it came up, but I played some Arabic music for a classmate, and before I knew it, I was doing some hip drops and mayas and even trying to resurrect my ¾ shimmy. (That was a little harder than I remembered.) And when I came home, I pulled out my playlist and old recital DVDs and started jamming around my living room. It was just some basic moves, and layering was NOT happening, but goodness it felt great! So great, in fact, I am debating about finally being able to sign up for some online classes, once I’m done with nursing school and boards. This morning, I woke up a bit achy, but that could just as easily be due to the rice I ate last night with dinner. It’s a grain, it increases my inflammation, and it usually dissipates with some activity in the morning.
This is HUGE for me. In the past, it’s been a dangerous thing just to listen to my Arabic pop playlist, because I inevitably start dancing, and as a result, my back usually screams after 2 minutes of even trying to move like I used to. But not yesterday. I danced on and off for about a half hour, taking breaks and watching my DVDs, and I was just a bit achy. This is an enormous difference from being in PAIN from even just a little movement.
I plan to go slow. I plan to listen carefully to my body’s whispers before they turn into screams. It will be hard, because I miss the release and the joy that dance gave me, but maybe with baby steps, I’ll go farther in the long term.