Pain Up – Morale Down

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My second semester of nursing school ended on May 5th of 2015. It was a tough semester. Faculty changes, fundraising and organizing a breakfast for 200 students and administrators, and an extra class really took its toll on me. I was supposed to have 2 weeks off before we started our 10 week summer session, beginning with our psychiatric rotation.

I thought I was smart. I scheduled all my appointments while I was off during my first week, thinking I could have a week to “rest,” before we began another semester. I didn’t take into account how much work I’d have to do before my classes even started, and I didn’t take into account that my socializing (even as little as it was) only wore my body down further.

I’m exhausted. I’m hurting. I’m stressed and losing my patience with my own family. I don’t like who I am right now. I’ve been negative and snippy and miserable to be around. Today I am going to try and turn that around. I start class tomorrow, and I’ve finished up my work that had to be done in preparation for tomorrow’s class, so today I will sit and color. Or lie on the couch and watch crappy day time television. Or curl up with good book. The real kind. The one with pages and everything. There is something therapeutic about the weight of a book in your hand, and having the silence broken only be the sound of turning the pages…

I have got to get better at expressing my boundaries. Hell, I’ve got to get better at recognizing my boundaries. I think that is the real issue. For example, I love to socialize. I love having friends over, going to visit friends and I love being with people. It’s uplifting to me. But too much of a good thing… well, it’s not always a good thing.

Balance. I need to find it.

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